She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Randomize
