Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Quick, to the slutcave!
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize