Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
