Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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