He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
