Where did you get a picture of my penis
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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