dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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