Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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