and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Randomize
