Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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