Its about making memories worth repressing
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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