so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
