I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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