ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
