i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
i think i just lost a toe
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
