like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
