I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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