One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
