She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
