how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
