Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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