sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Randomize