I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize
