i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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