their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
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