my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Someone came in the potted fern
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
