I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
