Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize