it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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