Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
