So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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