I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
