do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
