She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
