it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
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