I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
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