I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
