I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
