i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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