It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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