my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I got inside last night via doggy door
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize