i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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