So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Randomize
