Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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