just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
The police scanner is talking about you again....
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Randomize
