They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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