People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Randomize
