I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize