How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Randomize
