Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Randomize
