...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
